Recipe for Giant Rain Frog Sadness

This Giant Rain Frog is very unhappy for 3 reasons. They are simple reasons, but nonetheless they make for a lifetime of sadness.1. Fatness

As a rotund frog, life is rough. Fat frogs are slow frogs. Slow frogs are fast food. Snickering from the slimmer amphibians can constantly be heard behind your back, which then becomes ever present in your mind. Frog bulimia and/or anorexia can quickly ensue if self confidence cannot be established readily.

2. Ugliness

Ugliness compounded with fatness is a recipe for disaster. Males have to work extra hard to win the hearts of females (see the handsome gentleman croaking in the second picture) because I firmly believe personality is important in this situation.

3. Human Curiosity

Humans are always fascinated by ugly fat things (ex. Rosie O’donnell, and the countless image results on google) which puts the unfortunate Giant Rain frog in quite a predicament. Just look at this frog’s facial expression. If that doesn’t read “I detest my very existence” I don’t know what does.