NSFW: Fleshy 'Penis Snake' Discovered in the Amazon

Habitat: Amazon River Basin

Status: Data Deficient

This is by far the strangest discovery I’ve heard about in the animal kingdom in quite some time. I apologize for the blushes I’m sure you’re all experiencing right now but this ‘penis snake,’ as its been dubbed on the internetz, was just too good not to post. Definitely a stupendous start to my Thursday morning – dunno about you!

This slithering purple creature – which isn’t a actually a snake at all – is a species of caecilian, a limbless amphibian that resembles a giant earthworm (among other things as it turns out). Biologist Julian Tapan identified it as Atretochoana eiselti. The phallic thing was discovered when workers were draining a portion of the Madeira River — a major tributary of the Amazon — for a controversial hydroelectric project. In fact, six were found. THANK GOD!

Little to nothing is known about this species but it is though to be aquatic and lacks lungs, instead opting to breathe through its skin. They have very poor eyesight and rely mainly on smell to get around. Oh, and ladies these guys get to be 30 inches in length. Be sure to book your tickets to the Amazon quickly.

That’s disgusting, Carly. Shame on you.